Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize