I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
