your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
