You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
