so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
So squirting runs in the family.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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