new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
