I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
