maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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