I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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