I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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