Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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