think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
