Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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