Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
