okay pat passed out under dana's car
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
