Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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