He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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