I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
