so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
