Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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