apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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