oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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