he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
