Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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