he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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