oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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