do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
