doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
