she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
