How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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