bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
