he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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