Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
