...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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