I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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