he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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