you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
