Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
