"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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