so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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