Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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