I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Randomize
