the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
