We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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