Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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