i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
