Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
