I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
