I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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