Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
